Prologue

I guess to me what I would consider the current era started once my late wife moved in with her boyfriend. I moved to my mom’s with the kids and was working in a homeless shelter. It was uneventful until my mom passed away. Shortly thereafter, Michelle (the late wife), needed a place to stay because she broke up with her boyfriend and came to live with me again. Subsequently, the landlord where my mom was renting from wanted to make us leave so I was forced to move to a rather crappy apartment.

Michelle grew increasingly paranoid and ultimately went missing and was later found dead due to exposure and/or wild animal attack. It became a thing on the news, my time was well documented (was at work) and kids and I had to manage with 2017 double punching us. 2018 was a blur that ultimately led me to getting fired rather unjustly. Unemployment agreed and I got benefits. From there I stayed home and used food as a comfort. Ultimately that culminated in me ending up in the hospital in mid 2019

I guess my blood platelets were running really low and they had to give me a blood transfusion. In the hospital I resolved to drop the weight and pursue cross-dressing and dating guys.

Made a plan to stop at the gym everyday one hour of walking one hour swimming even if it’s very slow and to cut back on some of the snacks. I went from over 200 lb to as low as 125lbs. With some encouragement from some newfound friends Samantha and Pam, I decided to transition.

2019 was seen as a failure for me because I did not find a stable relationship. I resolved to meeting up with the other trans to expand my social network. And that’s how I met Brian.

I was only to meet him to help him feminize more. Yet, we ended up hitting it off pretty strongly and we ended up dating. He seemed like the perfect guy at first. Someone with strong values, working a decent job, a gentleman and accepting of me AND my kids. Heck, he is even a bit handsome.

Soon Brian became only the second person I ever told that I loved and I meant it. I actually got to feel the way I always wanted to feel, like someone’s girlfriend. I really felt a joy about this new life especially once we had the kids over and he interacted with them expertly. Even if he hadn’t told me I would have known that he was a father, and a good one. And when he dressed up he was fun. Look at his pic


Yeah he wasn’t the cutest girl but the way I saw him, he was gorgeous! And then wolf 359…

It was my son’s birthday and there’s this great day going on

One of THE most wholesome days in my life. We’re working together as a family. It’s a genuine good time. I even brought over extra clothes. Dinner is being made when I decide to use his phone to find mine. I go to his phone and I notice a heart emoji from a girl. Curiosity gets the better part of me and I investigate. I find that he is flirting with this girl and sending inappropriate texts. I don’t want to ruin my son’s birthday so I don’t say anything until the kids go to sleep.

I confront him. He gets upset about the violation of his privacy. I insist on reading more. He refuses. I assert that since he’s being defensive over his cell phone and given what I seen that I’m going to presume that he’s cheating and indicate to him that I’m going to leave if I don’t get access to the phone. A drawn out argument ensues.

He eventually is in tears and relents. While I’m reading the text he keeps on grabbing the phone then giving it back to me and insisting that I am tearing him apart, likening it to being raped. I continue. He eventually snatches the phone and tells me that he’s done. I’m in tears cuz he talked so lowly of me to his friends and I hadn’t seen him aggressive before

I gather up my belongings and I’m trying to do my makeup and wig. He insists that I leave at once. The kids were still asleep and I had to get them awake and ready to go in a frenzy.

For reasons I’m unsure of, I accept his apologies. The relationship becomes quite toxic however. Then a month later I notice something unusual happening.

I start to notice some weird analogies going on in the chat room. I come in with my usual chatroom persona but it’s almost like I was being called out directly. I forgot something happened in real life and I reacted to it and so did the chat room and at that moment I felt like I was hacked.

At first I assumed that it was confined to just one app, maybe 2. I start to notice oddly specific memes. I’m like wtf. I end up being absolutely fascinated and terrified of what the hell this was. The cold chills happened when I went on my home computers and realized that they were infected. And somehow no matter what I did I couldn’t outdo it. Usually, I’m computer savvy enough to revert any changes that have occurred

I try many things including a clean reinstall of Windows. eventually my computers end up getting bricked one by one until the house is without computers. It’s chaotic because now the kids are fighting over cell phones.

I find several ways to engage with whoever or whatever is responsible.

I keep trying to get Brian to believe me but he refuses. Later he says he believes me only too much later prove my point that he was lying about believing me by acknowledging that he thought I was delusional. I had a hard time figuring out from myself sussing out exactly what was happening only that I knew that something was happening, as did the kids. Soon, it seemed like the being messed with extended beyond the internet

My relationship with Brian goes sour and we have an extended breakup and the beginning of my blogging starts with me basically setting up a date with an ex fling**

**I’ve yet to add my older entries, right now my blog starts on May14th, though I have entries dating back to July 2020 on my discord that will eventually be imported

As of recently, I started to style my life as though it were a Star Trek episode.

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